Let's imagine that forces conspired against Adam Lambert. They decided he had to return to his home planet, the one where people can sing like that, people can create like that.
If so, this would be the closest "American Idol" ever. As it is, it's still sort of close: For the first time, I have no idea who will be ousted Wednesday. I also have no idea who will be the runner-up to Adam in the show's finale.
Here are a few of my comments; please add yours:
1) Originality is a good thing. It is NOT, however, the only thing. Every week, Lil Rounds shows that she can sing anything beautifully, in the style of the original performer. It would be better to create her own version, but she's still terrific; the judges should get off their one-note criticism of her.
2) Speaking of creating your own version, here's a hint: It really should be better than the original. I didn't like Kris Allen's version at all. Sure, it's gutsy to give "She Works Hard For the Money" a sort of calypso, Latino feel; still, it just wasn't all that pleasant to hear.
3) The show's best judge is Randy Jackson. Its worst judge is whoever sits next to Randy Jackson. Paula Abdul sat there for years and simply put what he said into different words. Now? Sometimes I don't think Kara DioGuardi even bothers to change the words.
4) Abdul, by comparison, has become pretty good now that she's separated from Jackson. Her comment about "shopping in the women's department" actually made sense. And I enjoyed hearing her tell Anoop Desai that "real men know how to wear pink."
5) Simon Cowell claimed he didn't understand that. But then again, we've just learned that he's not a real man; I don't think he has a clue how to wear pink.
6) The trouble with disco week is basic: This is a singing competition and disco songs -- fun, bouncy, vibrant -- tend to have a limited range. To show off, you have to change the song; those changes can sometimes be iffy.
7) Most people took a few chances with their song, but not too many. They just tried to sing the dickens out of it and remind us that the disco era was -- for reason that are now hard to remember -- fun.
8) OK, it was a bit disconcerting to see babyfaced, 16-year-old Allison Iraheta sing "give me some hot stuff, give me some loving tonight." It's an uncomfortable juxtaposition, sort of like seeing photos of JonBenet Ramsey with all her make-up.
9) Two people will go tonight. My should-go picks are Allen first and Matt Giraud second, with Desai third and Danny Gokey fourth.
10) My will-go predictions? Giraud first, with the second one a toss-up. I'll reluctantly predict Rounds, with Desai third. Next week, we're down to the four-way fight to see who gets to stand next to Lambert when he becomes the new American idol.